Have you ever seen the commercials or TV shows where someone gets a whole new look? They go in for plastic surgery and get new cheeks, nose, boobs and butt along with liposuction for the final effect. Or the “Biggest Loser” TV show where they lose tons of weight, get a makeover and tight clothes?
They show the people walking out into a crowd of friends and family and everyone claps, and oohs and ahs at them.
How long does that moment last? One week, one month, maybe three months? Eventually that person wakes up and figures out they are still the same person inside. They have the same job, friends, and beliefs. They may look different, but unless they consciously changed how they felt about themselves before the surgery, they are still the same inside.
This is one reason most all gain back the weight they lost, plus some! They didn’t do the inner work.
This reminds me of what Marianne Williamson said, paraphrasing, “If I can’t stand being alone with myself, how I can expect someone else to be with me?”
How many times have you thought “when I have/am fill in the blank, I’ll be happy, perfect, successful, or loved?
We do this to ourselves. We put conditions on external circumstances to judge and decide whether we deserve love or happiness.
Well, as many reasons as people. We each have our own beliefs about how happy we can be. Many of us have a ceiling or limit of how much good we will allow into our life.
Confidence, deservability, and value all play a role here. It may be from these needs not being met growing up, inheriting a family member’s low self esteem, a religious belief, being bullied and put-down by friends & family or abuse. Whatever the core reason is, this is not who you are.
When you look at a child, do you see imperfections and faults? Probably not. They are curious, excited, and happy to be in their bodies. They are thrilled to go out in public wearing their tutu or batman outfit feeling proud of who they are on the inside. They don’t care what others think, they just feel good. Unless an adult has molded their beliefs, children love themselves and feel like they deserve. Why wouldn’t they?
So why don’t we deserve? Why do we feel we need to be perfect to be successful? Why do we put conditions and limits on our own happiness?
These are all learned and can be unlearned.
So Try this:
- Take a deep breath, get still and focus on the moment.
- Ask yourself “what do I need to be happy,” Or “what is my body asking for?”
- Listen to your words and thoughts. When you realized you have just put a condition on yourself, remove it, let it go. Understand it’s an external condition, not your true needs.
- As these conditional beliefs show up, (they will); Say STOP! Or picture a large X or a heart, and replace it with an unconditional loving belief. Such as “I have ____,”” I am ____” or ” I am that to which I am seeking”.
- Put yourself back into your breath, filing your body with it’s life-force.
Next, Ask yourself:
- Where did I learn this?
- Who is this not-deserving belief helping?
- How is it helping me? Does it keep me safe in my comfort zone?
- How is this hurting me?
- How is this affecting my loved ones?
- How is this helping the energy of the earth?
- How is this helping my spirit grow?
Write down your answers, journal or meditate over them. Put some thought into the why’s. Hypnosis is a fantastic tool to uncover your hidden beliefs. The reason you feel or do the things you do. Once uncovered, change can start to happen.
I am a certified Hypnotherapist and love when my clients have “ah-ha” moments of why they feel a certain way. It’s so liberating to understand the core reason. Knowing frees you so you can move forward. Many of my clients have dropped weight effortlessly, released pain, and gained self love, just from uncovering their subconscious beliefs.
For those of you who are ready to let go of old stuck ways and move forward into the life you were meant to live, I am available for consultations on the phone or in person. Contact me here, and we can discuss what fits your needs best.
I will leave you with another great Marianne Williamson quote,
“Ego says, once everything falls into place, I’ll feel peace. Spirit says, Find your peace, and then everything will fall into place.”
Great energy is my wish for you,